A year ago I was sick but didn’t really know it and everything was still ‘normal’ (or ‘old’ normal). I feel like I have a handle on my routine but when I think about having a disease I still feel a disconnect from it and from the idea of it. I don’t really know how to explain it. Sometimes it feels like there is a fog around me that I can’t see through, when I try and see myself.
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So much on my mind and I don’t feel like I can deal with any of it.
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Today was the day last year that I checked my BG for the first time. I think I remember checking it twice because I didn’t believe it. One of the nurses I was working with actually suggested it (and I had been thinking it but not really wanting to think it) because I had mentioned to her my concerns and suspicion.
Holy fuck my body has been through a lot in the last 12 months.